Starfish Sleeper

Sleeping alone is something that I’m still getting accustomed to again. After being in a relationship for six years it’s hard to go from sleeping next to someone (sharing their warmth and getting used to their breathing noises) to nothing. So when I first became newly single it was a struggle. I mean it still is. But in my earlier days if I was falling asleep before four am it was a good night. Now I’m usually out by two. But, that being said, there are definite perks. 

Firstly, I can sleep like a starfish without either being woken up with a “can you move over” or hearing about it the next day. 

Secondly, I can fart all I want in bed and I’m not worried about being polite or grossing anyone out. 

Thirdly, no one to have the classic blanket tug of war with. 

Fourthly, no one to keep me up with their snoring. 

And finally, which admittedly I still miss once in a while, no more of the night time “are you still awake” thrust. Or the “good morning” boob pawing. 

They say let sleeping dogs lie. This bitch too. 


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